Sunday, 3 June 2012

Very vey random entry

Just got back from watching four episodes from the latest season of Grey's Anatomy. The last episode made me feel sooo nostalgic! George's mum shows up and it got them all talking about George. How I miss George, he is partly the reason why I just adore the first three seasons of Grey's Anatomy. The show's still great but not as great as it used to be. I can do without Izzie, but George... Meredith is right: "He was the good one."
"Hey, Alex, remember when you gave him syphilis?"
"Heart in the elevator."
MEMORIES! :D

I'm going to the dentist tomorrow. Usually it's just an ordinary 10-15 minutes check-up and then I'm done. But I always, always have to convince myself that I won't get bad news. It's also a new dentist so I'm kind of worried about that too. And I'm nervous of not being able to find the place on time and miss my appointment or be late for it, my sense of orientation sucks (apparantly runs in the family, grandma has the same problem). Reason for being nervous before going to the dentist? Reason for fearing bad news? I'm not really scared of the dentist's, it's just that I've never had anesthesia and I've heard so many horror stories about how much it hurts :/ My imagination for pain is still very much functioning.

I miss reading. I always plan on reading loads and then I never do. I remember when I could do two or three books a month, now I hardly do five books a year. Friggin school started demanding my attention. I have pretty much an entire full-size bookshelf of books to read for the first time. I keep buying books that seem interesting and then I never get around to reading them.

I'm so very tired. Feels like I've done nothing but running around and having stuff to fix this week. Mostly it's been work. Today it was to make sure I had all of Dixi's things packed and then get her into her transporting cage. Her new owner came to pick her up today and because of that now there'll be a picture bomb of pictures and a video :P
I will miss her so much. There's a really big empty space in the hallway right now where she's supposed to be and it's so strangely quiet. It's weird not having to think about her all the time.

Then we have the issue that I should be revising Japanese to be prepared for the B-level course that I'll be taking this autumn. I think most of is still there, but I know a lot falls away so I'll start from the beginning. If I have the time I'll make sure to learn some new kanji as well. I'm pretty confident with the kana, but the kanji definately need to be revised, especially the stroke order! I always sucked at the stroke order xD I'm so excited about going back to Japanese.

Then there are of course the future. The big scary future. I don't know what I want to do anymore and it scares me. Just the thought of not studying and not going back to school scares me. Studying is all I've ever done, all I've ever known. It's hard to imagine my life without it and I'm scared of looking for a job. I'm scared of being rejected one too many times and sitting there without income and bills to pay. I have no idea what I want to do and I have a year to figure that out. Reality scares me.

Tomorrow I'm going back north. Going back to Toni and I'm overly excited. Wonder if I'll get any sleep tonight...?

As of right now I'm putting on nail polish.

I'll end with a quote that has had me feeling extremely nostalgic, safe, childish, happy and sad at the same time for the entire day:

"Whether it'll come back by page or by the big screen, Hogwarts will always be there to welcome you home."
- Jo Rowling

Good night and I'll hopefully write more soon :)

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