Monday, 5 November 2012

Body ideals can go screw themselves

I'm angry. Terribly angry. Just read a blog post from some idiot Swedish girl who said that it's weird with it being so okay with girls being buxom in Sweden and not as thin as in all the big cities she's been to. That it's unhealthy and none of the buxom girls are fit and content with their bodies. Original post here. Suddenly it's even less strange that many girls of today are starving themselves to meet impossible standards. 

Like so many other girls, I was convinced that I was abnormal, large, ugly and fat. It's not until recently that I've started to realise that maybe I am pretty, maybe I do look good, maybe I don't need all that shit that media tells me I do. But I always did think that if I lost all that weight 'til I ended up at 63kg ("ideal weight" for my height) I'd be pretty, if I got that flat and fit belly I'd be hot, and if I lost three cups so I ended up at B, instead of present E, and could fit into any kind of clothing easily then I'd be normal. If I could lose 10 cm on top of that I'd not be large. And who the hell says I'm unhealthy just cause I'm not on any friggin diet?

According to BMI I'm overweight. My 78 kg are too much for my 173 cm. BMI tells me so, the scale tells me so, but the people, the people keep telling me I'm beautiful and pretty. Now that I look back I realise that boys have been interested in me for years - I just haven't seen it. Today I often catch people looking at me at the bus or on the train. Usually I wonder why. Wondering if I look weird or if I have something in my face. Maybe I'm just pretty? I'd like to think so.

The horror if I'd be considered pretty. I'm too tall, too fat, too pale, too nerdy, too much tomboy to be considered pretty given present standards, right? The horror if a dorky nerdy geek girl could be considered pretty, right?

So you tell me.

Am I pretty?


My comment at the blog post:
Jag blir arg när jag läser det här. Jag väger 78 kilo. Jag är 173 cm lång. Enligt BMI är jag överviktig, enligt folk är jag snygg. Och det är bara den sista månaden som jag börjat inse det så smått själv. Vet du varför? För jag var övertygad om att ifall jag skulle vara snygg var jag tvungen att väga 63 kg ("idealvikten för mina 173 cm), ha en pytteliten B-kupa istället för nuvarande E-kupan, platt vältränad mage och gärna vara 10 cm kortare också. Guess what? None of it's gonna happen. Du är en fucking jävla idiot och jag blir rädd av att tänka på att världen är full av såna som du. Det här jävla idealet som du har fått på hjärnan har bara funnits de senaste ca 40 åren. Under resten av historien skulle kvinnor ha breda höfter och stor byst för det var ett tecken på bra barnafödande och ansågs vackert. INGET AV DET ÄR FUCKING MÖJLIGT OM MAN SKA SVÄLTA SIG SJÄLV TILL "IDEALVIKT". Men det gamla idealet är hälsosammare.Tack för mig, gå och dra nåt gammalt över dig.

1 comment:

  1. Hi! Im inael, your venezuelan youtube friend,im not sure if you remember me. I am digging your blog xD and i think you are really pretty :) The media wants all the girls to be the same and look the same, you are very different and i think thats cool.

    ReplyDelete

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